Down With Monday!
Why does Monday even exist? I mean in our memories most Mondays are replaced by a dark void and the ones we do remember, we wish we didn't. It seems that as a society, we would be better off to just erase the existence of Monday completely. This process would be quite simple really. I petty 24 hours would just be added to Sunday night. Everyone would wake up refreshed and energized, ready to attack Tuesday. This is genius! Life would be good again. Work morale would increase exponentially while suicide and depression rates hit all time lows. I truly think this is a good idea? Is anyone with me?
Some of you might be wondering what sprung this seemingly unprovoked lash out against this "innocent" day of the week. Well truthfully it really doesn't matter, the day sucks, we all know it. Time to take it down. Ok, ok, stop begging, I guess it wouldn't hurt to explain the offenses committed. To start with I had to get up at 6:30. Yeah, yeah I know I get up at 6:30 every other day of the week also, but I only hate Mondays, so it doesn't really matter what time I get up the other 6 days. Second, once I arrived at work I had to drive around the parks in the entire city of North Mankato, emptying the garbage cans. This usually takes me like 2 1/2 hours, how long did it take me today? 4 1/2 hours! Why? Because some dumbass decided to dump a bunch of dead minnows in one of the park's garbage cans, which started to decompose and almost cause me to vomit all over some stray cat. This took me a while to clean out. Another reason why it took me an extra two hours was completely my fault, but I am still going to blame Monday, just because it was in fact Monday when these events took place. I emptied all the garbage cans and I had half a load of empty cans in the back of my truck. My only remaining task was to take the empty cans back to where I grabbed them. This would have been all fine and dandy except for the fact that I got down to one can and for the life of me couldn’t remember where the hell I got it from. I drove around the city for like 40 or 50 minutes checking all the parks until I finally found it, pretty lame. For the remainder of the day I just stood out in the extreme heat and humidity, sweating like the fat ass I am, and shoveling shit into a tractor bucket, if that isn't exciting I don't know what is.
When it comes down to it, it is quite obvious that as a general rule....... Mondays Blow! Oh well, I am home now, and I am happy. I still believe, however, that we should get rid of Monday. I am open to suggestions.
Peace
Some of you might be wondering what sprung this seemingly unprovoked lash out against this "innocent" day of the week. Well truthfully it really doesn't matter, the day sucks, we all know it. Time to take it down. Ok, ok, stop begging, I guess it wouldn't hurt to explain the offenses committed. To start with I had to get up at 6:30. Yeah, yeah I know I get up at 6:30 every other day of the week also, but I only hate Mondays, so it doesn't really matter what time I get up the other 6 days. Second, once I arrived at work I had to drive around the parks in the entire city of North Mankato, emptying the garbage cans. This usually takes me like 2 1/2 hours, how long did it take me today? 4 1/2 hours! Why? Because some dumbass decided to dump a bunch of dead minnows in one of the park's garbage cans, which started to decompose and almost cause me to vomit all over some stray cat. This took me a while to clean out. Another reason why it took me an extra two hours was completely my fault, but I am still going to blame Monday, just because it was in fact Monday when these events took place. I emptied all the garbage cans and I had half a load of empty cans in the back of my truck. My only remaining task was to take the empty cans back to where I grabbed them. This would have been all fine and dandy except for the fact that I got down to one can and for the life of me couldn’t remember where the hell I got it from. I drove around the city for like 40 or 50 minutes checking all the parks until I finally found it, pretty lame. For the remainder of the day I just stood out in the extreme heat and humidity, sweating like the fat ass I am, and shoveling shit into a tractor bucket, if that isn't exciting I don't know what is.
When it comes down to it, it is quite obvious that as a general rule....... Mondays Blow! Oh well, I am home now, and I am happy. I still believe, however, that we should get rid of Monday. I am open to suggestions.
Peace
posted by Adam at 7:15 PM
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